Difficult Relationships / Rod E. Smith

“I don’t know what to do. My brother (25) and his girlfriend (24) are coming to stay for a few days. They live together (and are not married). My children (boys who are 6 and 7) know they are not married and I don’t know if I should let my brother and his girlfriend stay [...]

Filed under: Double standards, Faith, Family, Growing up, Happiness, Home, In-laws | Tagged: brother, married, sex, sleeping, unmarried, visits, where, who | 2 Comments »

“My husband and my parents just do not get along. They seem to be fighting about everything and anything. My husband says he’s not at fault and my parents say they are not at fault. But I feel trapped in the middle. How do I deal with both without hurting or betraying the other.”
Get [...]

Filed under: High maintenance relationships, In-laws | Tagged: , conflict, get along, husband, In-laws | 1 Comment »

“My sister-in-law is very judgmental when it comes to how I treat my children (8 and 6). She rolls her eyes behind my back, she makes subtle comments, she sighs; she tells other relatives that she wonders what “some of the children in the family” will become. My husband just laughs it off and says [...]

Filed under: Authentic love, Boundaries, Cheating, Community, Compatibility, Dads, In-laws, Interpersonal intimacy, Jealousy, Listening | Tagged: Children, critical, Family, husband, mother, mothering, raising children, sister-in-law, wife | 1 Comment »

Would it be fair to my husband to write a letter to his family in order to distance myself from them? I have had hostility and rejection from them for 25 years. The sting of rejection has now become unbearable and I feel uncomfortable in their presence. They never ask how we are or make [...]

Filed under: Authentic love, Difficult Relationships, Disrespect, Family, In-laws, Spousal abuse, Toxic Relationships, Voice | 1 Comment »

“I have been married for two years and we have had a constant battle about how often we visit my parents. My husband put in place his rules of ‘creating appropriate distance’ with fortnightly visits, which are often pushed to visits every fourth week. I thought we’d visit both sets of parents weekly [...]

Filed under: Attraction, Authentic love, Boundaries, Communication, Compatibility, Control issues, Differentiation, Difficult Relationships, Disrespect, Divorce, Domination, Family, In-laws, Interpersonal intimacy, Intimidation, Jealousy | No Comments »

“Our daughter has now been married for three years to her second husband. The marriage has broken down horribly. After one counseling session he refuses to go again. He is totally absorbed in his work, sometimes doesn’t even go to bed at night. He verbally abuses and finds fault with everything our daughter says or [...]

Filed under: Anger, Authentic love, Blended families, Communication, Community, Compatibility, Control issues, Happiness, High maintenance relationships, In-laws, Love, Manipulation, Marriage, Relationships, Second marriages, Toxic Relationships, Triggers, Trust, Victims, Voice | 4 Comments »

“I am an only son with a good network of uncles and aunts. After my marriage my wife has become quite disillusioned with all my relatives. There were instances where she was not treated the way she expected to be treated when we visited them. Now they want to visit us at our home and [...]

Filed under: In-laws | 1 Comment »

“I am so sad. It is so difficult to be second-guessed. My husband tells me not to worry about it yet I can’t help but feel displaced whenever my in-laws decide to take my role (with my children) or want to criticize me. I cannot win under any circumstance. Please help me learn [...]

Filed under: Authentic love, Communication, In-laws, Interpersonal intimacy, Personal growth, Relationships, Voice | No Comments »

Last week my in-laws were visiting us and expressed disapproval about how my husband was handling our thirteen-year-old son. They did not take the time to hear the full story behind out mutual decision to discontinue our son’s enjoyment of some privileges. My husband felt very down and he has brought it up several times [...]

Filed under: Family, In-laws | 1 Comment »

Someone who loves you will…

almost always put their cellular phone off when you are together
not avoid or screen your phone calls or check up on who you have been phoning
not lie to you
make eye contact when you speak and listen to what you are saying
say ‘please’ and ‘thank you’ a lot
not tell you what you [...]

Filed under: Authentic love, Communication, Community, Compatibility, Control issues, Forgiveness, Generosity, In-laws, Interpersonal intimacy, Recovery, Relationships, Toxic Relationships, Triggers, Trust, Valentines Day, Voice | 8 Comments »