Difficult Relationships / Rod E. Smith

Lizz,
There are a whole range of responses that men have to women being pregnant and giving birth. Difficult though it is for me to understand, I’m aware that a significant number of men find pregnant women to be unusually attractive, even to the point of becoming fantasy objects. Likewise, some men see mothers as more [...]

Filed under: Communication, Difficult Relationships, Disrespect, Divorce, Double standards, Penis propelled, Personal contact, Personal growth, Pornography, Rage, Re-marriage | Tagged: pregnancy | No Comments »

“My boyfriend and I are about to get married. I have a problem. He’s insecure that my daughter’s father is in her life. What do I do to assure him that nothing is going on between my ex and me other than taking care of our child? What do I do?” (Edited)
It is not [...]

Filed under: Boundaries, Children, Coaching, Communication, Dating, Differentiation, Difficult Relationships, Divorce, Growing up | No Comments »

“My ex-wife still tries to dominate me and interfere in my life. I have moved on and have a new woman. My teenage daughter and I have a very good relationship but whenever my ex-wife is around I am reminded why I divorced her. How do I get her to understand she is divorced and [...]

Filed under: Authentic love, Communication, Differentiation, Difficult Relationships, Divorce, Family, High maintenance relationships, Insight, Interpersonal intimacy | Tagged: boyfriend, Dating, ex, girlfriend, Past relationships, sex | 2 Comments »

“I want to save my marriage. Our situation has risen to a new level with issues of jealously and trust. He takes my car keys, he checks up on me, I no longer have friends around, and am no longer allowed ‘ladies nights.’ My brother is not allowed to visit. My husband doesn’t want children. [...]

Filed under: Abuse, Alcoholism, Anger, Attraction, Authentic love, Betrayal, Boundaries, Communication, Community, Compatibility, Control issues, Differentiation, Difficult Relationships, Divorce, Domination, Double standards, Grief, High maintenance relationships, Interpersonal intimacy, Intimidation, Jealousy | Tagged: better life, Counseling, counselling, future, husband, Marriage, passionate marriage, pre-marriage, Schnarch, wife | 4 Comments »

The power and sacredness of sex …
Morality, religious beliefs, and family values and expectations aside, which, by the way I believe is impossible to do, don’t have sex with a person whom you do not know, and are not committed to in every area of your life, for the long haul.
To say “it (sex) is [...]

Filed under: Affairs, Attraction, Authentic love, Betrayal, Boundaries, Communication, Community, Compatibility, Difficult Relationships, Disrespect, Divorce, Domination, Double standards, Flirting, Flirts, Forgiveness, Friendship, Generosity, Happiness, High maintenance relationships, Intimidation, Listening, Living together, Long distance relationships, Triggers, Trust, Victims, Violence, Voice | Tagged: best sex, Divorce, emotional cripple, growth, help, husband, life, Marriage, sex, wheelchair | No Comments »

Conditions under which counseling or therapy will be of most value….
1. Neither client nor therapist exaggerates therapist’s abilities or the client’s condition.
2. Therapist sees role as helping client steer toward a more productive, healthy future.
3. Client sees the “big picture” over the “long haul” rather immediate relief in the “here and now.” (Patience, patience, patience).
4. [...]

Filed under: Anger, Attraction, Authentic love, Blended families, Books, Boundaries, Differentiation, Difficult Relationships, Divorce, Domination, Education, Family, Forgiveness, Friendship, High maintenance relationships, Love, Manipulation, Marriage, Re-marriage, Recovery, Relationships, Responsive people, Second marriages, Sexual compatibility, Step parenting, Teenagers, Therapeutic Process, Toxic Relationships, Victims, Voice, Young Love | Tagged: affair, Counseling, Family, father, help, lover, Money, mother, parents, sex, therapy, time, waste | 7 Comments »

“My wife spends a lot of time at home because of family commitments and I understand that she needs to circulate with other people. When she does go out she seems to go over the top and stays out late. She doesn’t want to talk to, stating that she knows everything about me. When she [...]

Filed under: Attraction, Authentic love, Betrayal, Boundaries, Communication, Community, Compatibility, Differentiation, Difficult Relationships, Divorce, Domination, Home, Intimidation, Jealousy, Listening, Living together, Manipulation, Marriage, Past relationships, Schnarch, Triggers, Trust, Victims, Violence, Voice | Tagged: better life, Counseling, counselling, future, husband, Marriage, passionate marriage, pre-marriage, Schnarch, wife | 2 Comments »

Dear Stuck:
Note I have broken my own rules about keeping every entry to fewer than 250 words! But Stuck - I wanted you to hear from me, even if you might not like what I have to say.
Your letter appears below with my comments in BOLD and italics. I am sorry it took me so [...]

Filed under: Abuse, Affairs, Anger, Attraction, Authentic love, Difficult Relationships, Disrespect, Divorce, Personal growth, Toxic Relationships, Trust, Victims, Violence, Voice | Tagged: child, choices, ex, heartbroken, husband, Love, Relationships, stuck, wife | 4 Comments »

“I married 26 years ago out of a sense of guilt and it has never left. We have had a very difficult marriage and yet we both have a high level of commitment.  I want a healthier relationship but I don’t know how to get it. I know a healthier relationship starts with a healthier [...]

Filed under: Anxiety, Attraction, Authentic love, Betrayal, Boundaries, Compatibility, Control issues, Disrespect, Divorce, Domination, Happiness, Insight, Interpersonal intimacy, Toxic Relationships, Victims | Tagged: Divorce, emotional cripple, growth, help, husband, life, Marriage, wheelchair | No Comments »

Are you emotionally out of shape? Psychologically exhausted? Tramped on? Feel trapped? Just as a person can be physically run down, so also can one become emotionally depleted. Here are simple, not easy, steps to getting your internal life into shape. Each will do your internal life as much good as frequent exercise does for [...]

Filed under: Alcoholism, Anger, Authentic love, Betrayal, Boundaries, Cheating, Children, Coaching, Communication, Community, Control issues, Dads, Differentiation, Difficult Relationships, Disrespect, Divorce, Domination, Double standards, Family, First date, Flirting, Forgiveness, Friendship, Growing up, Happiness, High maintenance relationships, Intimidation, Jealousy, Listening, Living together, Long distance relationships, Marriage, Marriage and in-laws, Meditation, Parenting/Children, Past relationships, Personal growth, Pornography, Re-marriage, Reactivity, Recovery, Relationships, Sexual abuse, Sexual compatibility, Toxic Relationships, Victims, Violence, Voice | Tagged: , drink, drunk, emotional, exhausted, help, Marriage, remarriage, tired | 7 Comments »