Difficult Relationships / Rod E. Smith

“There’s a lonely man where I work. I know he’s unhappily married. I can see it in his eyes. You are going to say I should stay away from him because I have read you for years. What if I just want to have fun? The best sex I have ever had has been with [...]

Filed under: Attraction, Difficult Relationships, Relationships, Toxic Relationships, Victims | Tagged: affiars at work, married men | No Comments »

We are “just friends” is often the defense used by men and woman who are on the verge of an affair, or at least a liaison that will be hurtful to a spouse. We “just work together,” says the woman to her husband about a co-worker who gets all of her attention even on weekends. [...]

Filed under: Abuse, Attraction, Communication, Difficult Relationships, Relationships, Toxic Relationships, Victims, Voice | Tagged: Affairs, Relationships, we're just friends | 2 Comments »

“I cannot seem to break free of the memories I have when my wife was unfaithful to me. We have talked about it constantly and I have forgiven her and she has forgiven me for my anger. Yet, although it was quite a few years ago, it still niggles at me. Please help.”

Sometimes you have [...]

Filed under: Abuse, Affairs, Anger, Attraction, Authentic love, Relationships, Toxic Relationships, Voice | Tagged: Affairs, Cheating, forgive, get over an affair | 3 Comments »

“My husband (of 6 months) was going through a divorce when we met. It concerns me that he spends so much time taking care of his skin (facials), going to the gym, and having tummy reduction treatments. I’m pleased that he looks after himself but I feel he is a bit excessive. He will go [...]

Filed under: Attraction, Authentic love, Communication, Control issues, Voice, Womanhood | Tagged: Communication, facials, gym, husband, worship of self | No Comments »

If you can hear the voice of a spouse of lover saying any of the following 10 points to you, I’d suggest your relationship could use some renewal.
Don’t say you love me and then…

Disregard (write off, refuse to consider) what I say, think, and feel.
Demand from me, or try to manipulate me into, sexual acts [...]

Filed under: Attraction, Authentic love, Trust, Valentines Day, Victims, Voice | Tagged: Communication, help, marriage in trouble, wife and husband conflict | 1 Comment »

“I am sorry I have facilitated your insecurities by allowing your jealousy to influence my behavior. I will try not to do this anymore. It is not good for either of us. Walking on egg-shells is not how I like to spend my energy.”
“Going out to dinner with my friends (daughter, son, mother, father, brother, [...]

Filed under: Abuse, Anger, Attraction, Difficult Relationships, Domination, Interpersonal intimacy, Jealousy, Victims, Violence, Voice | Tagged: abused, difficult, husband is jealous, jealous, Jealousy, man, married, wife | 4 Comments »

Jealousy will remove purity from your relationship. Since jealousy expresses the very opposite of trust, once the jealousy virus entrenches itself (which it usually does perversely in the name of love) you and your relationship will become something you do not want to be. Freedom will be displaced by resentment.
The jealous person will behave in [...]

Filed under: Abuse, Anger, Attraction, Authentic love, Betrayal, Control issues, High maintenance relationships, Jealousy, Victims, Violence, Voice | Tagged: controlling behavior, Jealousy | 3 Comments »

“We’ve been married for seven years and have two children. We have serious issues. I have been unfaithful. He has been very abusive. After the honeymoon years we found out what type of people we really are. I tried to leave but each time he would get sad and I would run back. He hasn’t [...]

Filed under: Abuse, Alcoholism, Attraction, Authentic love, Toxic Relationships, Victims, Violence, Voice | Tagged: abused, difficult, husband is jealous, jealous, Jealousy, man, married, wife | 2 Comments »

“There are two potential tragedies in life and dying isn’t one of them,” wrote Ronald Rolheiser, the Catholic theologian. “What’s tragic is to go through life without loving and without expressing love and affection toward those whom we do love.”
What great thoughts to ponder and then motivate us to action beyond romance on Valentine’s Day.
Let’s [...]

Filed under: Attraction, Authentic love, Valentines Day, Victims, Violence, Voice, Weddings, Womanhood, Young Love | Tagged: Abuse, catch-22, control, Love, Marriage, relationship, sex, unhappy, user, Valentines Day, Voice | 1 Comment »

“Our daughter is seeing a man and with a bad track record. She has already been married once before. The problem we have is the impact her life has upon her children. The children (9 and 7) are torn between their mother, father, and the new man. They want to be loyal to all the [...]

Filed under: Affairs, Attraction, Authentic love, Children, Communication, Differentiation, Difficult Relationships, Grandparents | Tagged: children and bonding, Divorce, parenting, remarriage, role of grandparents | 1 Comment »